On Sunday during a phone conversation with one of my Ohio relatives, she asked me what Orlando traffic is like. To put it in perspective I told her to pretend that she was in a crowd of one thousand people. Then I told her to imagine that all of those people wanted to kill her.

Late Monday night I wrote & performed a song for my girlfriend. Instead of throwing underwear at me, she made me dinner. Rock Stars worldwide filled with envy.

Tuesday led to the realization that one day, a guy in India is actually going to want to transfer millions of dollars to my bank account and I’m just going to delete his email out of habit.

I spent some time Wednesday evening scanning Craigslist for a dialysis machine that would replace my blood with coffee.

I was amazed on Thursday how ants will walk in a line, mimic one another, and blindly follow a leader anywhere they go. They’re a lot like teenagers.

After seeing the finished product on Friday, I suspected that my dishwasher wants a career change.

Saturday afternoon when the sun was at it’s peak, my house was bathed in a warm glow and became the most peaceful and serene place on Earth. This serenity was abruptly ended by the sound of a cat barfing.

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